Countless Army briefs warn soldiers and their spouses in explicit terms: A soldier’s “re-integration” into his family will be difficult and painful. My wife had to begin raising our newborn without me and never knew when a car might pull up in front of her house with soldiers announcing her husband’s death. The stress of the situation begins back at home.
At the same time, I was returning feeling guilty, yet grateful; depressed and cynical, yet hopeful. In other words, I was confused. I also felt incredibly detached from a society that knew little of war and seemed rather indifferent to the fact that we were still fighting one. All of these things combined to make “re-integration” difficult. But most importantly, I felt at war with my own sinful nature.
It is one thing to die for Christ—quite another to live for Him and die to self on a daily basis. The Apostle Paul was painfully aware of that battle and the reality that we are our own worst enemy. Our key comfort is the knowledge the battle belongs to the Lord.